--- title: "Relationship & Therapy Insights | Fanshen Thompson, LCSW" description: "Articles on couples therapy, sex therapy, intimacy, and reconnection — from a Berkeley-based LCSW serving all of California." lang: en json-ld: | [ { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": [ "ProfessionalService", "MedicalBusiness", "MedicalClinic" ], "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#business", "name": "Fanshen Thompson, LCSW", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com", "logo": "https://fanshenthompson.com/og.jpg", "image": "https://fanshenthompson.com/og.jpg", "email": "fanshen@fanshenthompson.com", "priceRange": "$$$", "medicalSpecialty": "Mental Health", "address": { "@type": "PostalAddress", "addressLocality": "Berkeley", "addressRegion": "CA", "addressCountry": "US" }, "areaServed": { "@type": "State", "name": "California" }, "contactPoint": { "@type": "ContactPoint", "contactType": "customer service", "email": "fanshen@fanshenthompson.com" }, "founder": { "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#practitioner" }, "employee": { "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#practitioner" }, "openingHoursSpecification": [ { "@type": "OpeningHoursSpecification", "dayOfWeek": [ "Tuesday", "Wednesday", "Thursday", "Friday" ], "opens": "09:00", "closes": "18:00" } ], "sameAs": [ "https://www.linkedin.com/in/fanshen-thompson-lcsw-672425216/", "https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100086164215212", "https://pin.it/5enxDfD" ] }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "Person", "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#practitioner", "name": "Fanshen Thompson", "honorificSuffix": "LCSW", "jobTitle": "Licensed Clinical Social Worker", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com", "image": "https://fanshenthompson.com/og.jpg", "email": "fanshen@fanshenthompson.com", "address": { "@type": "PostalAddress", "addressLocality": "Berkeley", "addressRegion": "CA", "addressCountry": "US" }, "worksFor": { "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#business" }, "hasCredential": [ { "@type": "EducationalOccupationalCredential", "credentialCategory": "License", "identifier": "LCSW #25004", "recognizedBy": { "@type": "Organization", "name": "California Board of Behavioral Sciences" } } ], "knowsAbout": [ "Couples Therapy", "Relationship Therapy", "Sex Therapy", "Individual Therapy", "Intimacy", "Communication", "Attachment", "Sexual Shame", "Desire Discrepancy" ], "sameAs": [ "https://www.linkedin.com/in/fanshen-thompson-lcsw-672425216/", "https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100086164215212", "https://pin.it/5enxDfD" ] }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#website", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com", "name": "Fanshen Thompson, LCSW", "publisher": { "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/#business" } }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://fanshenthompson.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Blog", "item": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog" } ] }, { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@type": "Blog", "@id": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog#blog", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog", "name": "Fanshen Thompson — Notes on Therapy, Intimacy & Relationship", "blogPost": [ { "@type": "BlogPosting", "headline": "The Hard — and Most Important — Work for a Healthy Relationship", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog/differentiation-in-relationships", "datePublished": "2026-05-11", "description": "Differentiation is the relationship skill that turns repeat fights into growth. A Berkeley couples therapist on why it matters and how it develops." }, { "@type": "BlogPosting", "headline": "What Couples Therapy Actually Looks Like", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog/what-couples-therapy-actually-looks-like", "datePublished": "2026-04-12", "description": "A grounded look at what really happens in the room — and online — when two people start couples therapy together." }, { "@type": "BlogPosting", "headline": "The Difference Between Therapy and Coaching", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog/the-difference-between-therapy-and-coaching", "datePublished": "2026-03-22", "description": "How to know which kind of support fits the moment you're in — and why the distinction matters." }, { "@type": "BlogPosting", "headline": "Let's Talk About Desire", "url": "https://fanshenthompson.com/blog/lets-talk-about-desire", "datePublished": "2026-05-19", "description": "Desire is more complicated — and more hopeful — than most of us were taught. A California therapist on spontaneous vs. responsive desire and what actually helps." } ] } ] --- [![Fanshen Thompson, LCSW](/assets/logo-mark-DCWEUPFA.png)Fanshen Thompson LCSW ](/) [Home](/)[About](/about) Services Specialties [Approach](/approach/gottman-method)[Notes](/blog)[FAQ](/faq)[Resources](/resources) [Book a Free 20-Minute Consultation](/contact) Notes # Writing on therapy, _intimacy, and the inner life of relationship._ Slow essays for people doing the work. - [ Couples Therapy May 11, 2026 · 4 min read ## The Hard — and Most Important — Work for a Healthy Relationship Differentiation — the ability to stay yourself while staying present with your partner — is the skill that turns repeated fights into real connection. Here's how it works and why it matters. ](/blog/differentiation-in-relationships) - [ Couples April 12, 2026 · 6 min read ## What Couples Therapy Actually Looks Like If you've never been to couples therapy, the idea can feel intimidating. Here's what to expect from the first session onward. ](/blog/what-couples-therapy-actually-looks-like) - [ Practice March 22, 2026 · 5 min read ## The Difference Between Therapy and Coaching Therapy and coaching can look similar from the outside. They are very different inside. ](/blog/the-difference-between-therapy-and-coaching) - [ Sex Therapy May 19, 2026 · 4 min read ## Let's Talk About Desire Desire isn't fixed. It shifts, changes, and looks different for every person. If you and your partner aren't always on the same page, you're not broken — you're human. ](/blog/lets-talk-about-desire) ![Fanshen Thompson, LCSW logo](/assets/logo-mark-DCWEUPFA.png) Relationship therapy for people who are ready for real change. Licensed Clinical Social Worker · LCSW #25004 [](https://www.psychologytoday.com/profile/971893) Affiliations ![Gesher Community Care affiliate provider](/__l5e/assets-v1/7e4684e6-648d-48d4-892e-5c8678e89c88/gesher-community-care.png) Online Therapy Sessions held via secure video for clients across California. Hours Tue–Fri, 9am–6pm PT Contact [fanshen@fanshenthompson.com](mailto:fanshen@fanshenthompson.com)[Book a Free 20-Minute Consultation](/contact) [](https://www.linkedin.com/in/fanshen-thompson-lcsw-672425216/)[](https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100086164215212)[](https://pin.it/5enxDfD) Explore - [About](/about) - [Therapy](/therapy) - [Therapy for Couples](/therapy/couples) - [Therapy for Individuals](/therapy/individuals) - [Sex Therapy](/therapy/sex-therapy) - [Coaching](/coaching) - [Notes](/blog) - [FAQ](/faq) - [Resources](/resources) - [Relationship Therapy in Berkeley](/relationship-therapy-berkeley) - [Find an Online Sex Therapist](/how-to-find-an-online-sex-therapist) - [Contact](/contact) Specialties - [Infidelity & Affair Recovery](/specialties/infidelity-affair-recovery) - [Desire Discrepancy](/specialties/desire-discrepancy) - [Sexual Shame](/specialties/sexual-shame) - [Communication Breakdown](/specialties/communication-breakdown) - [Anxious Attachment](/specialties/anxious-attachment-couples) - [Parenting Conflict](/specialties/parenting-conflict) In crisis? If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call or text [988](tel:988) (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) or call [911](tel:911). This site is not a substitute for emergency care. [Privacy](/privacy.html)[Terms](/terms.html)[Cookies](/cookie.html)[Disclosures](/disclaimers.html)[Good Faith Estimate](/good-faith-estimate.html)[Accessibility](/accessibility)[Cookie Settings](/cookie.html) Contacting this practice does not establish a therapist–client relationship. Individual outcomes vary. Nothing on this site guarantees a specific clinical result. © 2026 Fanshen Thompson, LCSW. All rights reserved. Photography by Allison Busch Website by [Automaus.ai](https://automaus.ai) Your privacy matters Functional cookies are required. Analytics and marketing cookies are off by default — you choose. 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